For the first few days of a new semester, I would normally be describing in detail a few first impressions of my professors or start talking about the new semester ahead. I didn’t realize I would be caught up with all my work for COA and our cluster’s big project for the Ateneo Sesquicentennial year. Not to mention the pressure of finishing the entire yearbook this December. Other things to be added to my long list of assignments are my Law school applications. It can get crazy, especially when you start hitting those frustrating bumps that make you feel quite powerless. Fortunately (and I really don’t know how I do it), even if the panic sinks in, I still end up with enough time for myself.

At this point in my life, I cannot lose sight on a lot of things. And as I go on living the last few months of my undergraduate year, I am somehow reminded by the things that I value, the things that I should value and the things I never realized I valued so much of. The ‘senior-syndrome’ may not have hit me yet, but I’m sure it will. I refuse to be caught up with things that occupy a huge chunk of my life right now without any realization whatsoever that there is no value in it. I’d like to believe that I’ve lived most of my life with enough passion for the things and the people I love. And all the while I’ve invested a part of myself in any of my interests, hobbies, talents, jobs, and even people, I’d like to think I’ve somehow have a better understanding of what I am capable of.

Having a healthy dose of confidence has yet to betray me. I never voluntary invest in things that I know I can only be half-hearted about. But approaching this sort of crossroads in my life leaves me a bit anxious. And I can’t help but be overwhelmed by my freakin doubts. Maybe I’m not alone with this. I’m sure a lot of college seniors are experiencing the same dilemma. Of course, little by little, there are events, realizations, little epiphanies here and there that help contribute to the achievement of my much needed personal clarity. Hopefully, as weeks go by, I may be able to find some answers. Or whatever.

As for my last undergraduate semester, I don’t think I’ve pondered enough about how it’s going to be like for me. For the most part, I am happy and grateful over a lot of things in my life. Even amidst this crazy bubble I’m in, there are many reasons to celebrate and to continue looking forward towards a great end to my undergraduate life. We’ll see how it all plays out.