I officially ended my third-year life yesterday. And after such a hell/heart-breaking FINALS week, I am overflowing with relief. And joy. And peace. There were so many moments since “holy week” started that I felt like breaking down. It was just all so emotionally and mentally exhausting. And the fact that I barely get any shut eye every day didn’t help.

A 3.5 for my Dacanay orals made it all so worth it though. :)

But I’m just glad it’s all over, and I can finally look forward to my most eventful Summer yet. I have tons of activities lined up for me and a Polsci Practicum to top all that!

I’ll try making a new layout before I leave for Singapore this Monday! :)

The four-day “break” that started last Thursday was the beginning of an all-too-unbearable state of despair and frustration over PolSci requirements. And amidst the frying of the brain cells are the added emotional highs and lows by some unforeseen events (school … erm.. course related) that I will not bother divulging over here.

It was insane. I felt like a prisoner in my own room, shifting from reading at least 6 sources and then ending up glued in front of my computer the rest of the night. I had at least two seemingly impossible-to-finish final papers. I say that because I just basically started during that week, so it was definitely falling under the “crammed” category. For the entire “holy week,” I experienced caffeine-induced nights that allowed me to sleep at around 3-4am, while waking up at 7 to continue typing my papers away. I have forgone going out with my family, and my only form of social interaction was through YM. Somehow, there was comfort in numbers. My co-Polsci coursemates share my pain and we try to find ways to “help” each other out. This is done mostly through emotional means. hahahaha. And after a lot of crazy, crazy events that transpired in line with the Polsci madness we are all experiencing, I really have learned to love my coursemates.

I still can’t believe I did all those. And now I’m sick with cough and colds, fighting my way through this because of the pending finals. I’m glad that I was able to sleep for a long time last night. I needed to rest because I felt as if my body is going to give up any time soon, and there’s no way I’m going to let that happen. I still have History166 later, Philo orals tomorrow and partnering up with Ray for our Theo orals on Thursday. Oooh! And a take-home exam due Thursday too! Somehow, I have absolutely no idea when I’d be able to start that.

This...

...continue reading more

I’d like to take comfort in the fact that I just finished one seemingly psychotic week. Perhaps that is somewhat of an overstatement. But allow me the liberty to make that exaggeration, especially after just enduring one of the most extremely trying weeks of my Ateneo academic life. I’ve technically got less that two weeks left before I end my junior year. Unfortunately, I really don’t have anything to rejoice about until the very last day. It will end when it ends. For the mean time, I gotta make the most out of it. More importantly, I gotta do well.

Days pass by so swiftly as I struggle to find time for myself. I feel as if instead of fitting into my schedule all the group reports and meetings, research and paper work, OJT applications, org meetings, interviews, etc., it feels as if I’m the one who has to fit myself in all those things. Maybe that doesn’t really make sense, but somehow I feel like I have to adjust myself. Sometimes it feels like everything else has been bigger than myself. Sigh. Nevermind. Simply put, it just gets quite exhausting.

Not that it hasn’t been any fun. Nor do I end up sacrificing fun ultimately. I’m so happy to be an incoming officer for COA (Council of Organizations) next school year as the Performing Arts Cluster Head, working with organizations that share the same passion for the arts. I’ve also gotten to know most of the COA officers, and I only have positive things to say. Moreover, I’m equally ecstatic to be the Associate Editor of Aegis 2009 (the Ateneo Yearbook). Embarking on my last year is something I never thought would happen all too soon, but the reality of it all is that it’s really THAT fast. And really quite exciting, which makes being active so worthwhile. I’m so determined to do a beautiful job.

Highlights of the...

...continue reading more

After reading my friend, Jed‘s blog about not missing a Feb 29 post, I decided I wouldn’t want to miss posting on a leap year!

It sucks that it’s a Friday night and I’m still studying a whole lot of powerpoints for my POS118 (Philippine Administrative System) finals tomorrow. And it also sucks that the internet is distracting me every now and then.

I am trying to find consolation on the upcoming concerts that I will get to watch next week, but the anticipation of the blackhole month that is March is something that I utterly dread.

Can I just sleep through it all and wake up in Singapore this April?

Can I?

I know I have been very negligent with this blog. Living through The Sem, while experiencing the most trying courses and teachers takes its toll, and blogging doesn’t seem to be a priority. I’d like to change that of course. Someday. haha.

I’m killing time before I go to my next class here at the Ateneo RSF. I also just finished my second Theo131 orals with Fr. Dacanay an hour ago. And the extreme relief after undergoing such life-changing event (haha) is one of a kind. I’m happy to say that I got the thesis statement I second wanted, and felt quite confident about it. Let’s see if I am able to keep my grade from my first orals, or maybe even get a higher one this time around.

I never really liked the second semester. Scholastically, my grades drop down a notch. Personally, I find myself looking forward to the nearing summer vacation. It’s still very trying, and this sem is no exception. My POS majors are usually the ones that pull my grade up. Unfortunately this time around, they’re all very unpredictable and challenging. Mahirap talaga. Yung tipong kahit na inaral mo na, minsan hindi mo pa rin talaga maintindihan. Ewan. Pakiramdam ko talaga ang bobo ko minsan.

Every now and then, I find myself at wits end. There is personal pressure there. The anticipation that I’m nearing my last year in college peaks my curiosity about even more what ifs. I can’t help but be engaged with various aspects of my life. and somehow I feel both involved and helpless at the same time. Does that even make sense?

Right. I’ll stop the vagueness now.

Maybe this is just part of growing up and learning from the world, the people around us. Sometimes you think you don’t, but really, you do. That just brings unwanted emotional baggage.

Shush. I still need to go to class.